Emptiness in My Heart
HopelessTried to walk on an empty field, but found no strength.
Tried to work, but found no will.
Tried to smile, but found no need.
I'm around them and I feel fine, warm.
but then I get into the emptiness of my cold room,
and the loneliness comes crashing down.
I really don't feel sad about it, I merely don't understand it.
There is a lot that I do not understand.
I do not understand why people have the need to be with others.
I do not understand why people have the need to feel.
Life would be so much easier without feelings.
I have tried to find a meaning to this thing that humans call 'life'.
I have tried to do so many times over, but found no answer.
Even though I am fond of someone,
I believe I feel only nothingness in my heart.
I feel bored most of the time.
I feel empty most of the time.
The joyful feelings have abandoned me a long time ago,
when I lost someone who was precious to me.
They call me anti-social,
they call me immature and childish,
but what they are not aware of,
is what I have been through.
The past is something that scares some people.
The past is something that we must not be afraid of.
The past is what may lead us to the future,
but, I would rather stay only with the present time.
I found myself asking is there is something missing in my life.
I found myself backing away from everyone I care for.
I found myself realizing the lack of emotions that I have.
I found myself feeling the need to hold onto something.
I'm aware how close I am to fall from the precipice...”
Medi-EXE . 06/06/09 . 18:05pm
Take care, Medi-chan..
--
"A piece of a broken dream, will suddenly cause people pain.. We were both cowards, who closed our eyes and left.. Those hurtful words you said to me, I still keep in my pocket.. When I touch it with my fingertips.. I feel this pain I miss.."
The whole summer without talking to you.... This is the worst torture ever... *sob* *sob*
--
My Japanese name is - 遠藤 Endoh (Distant wisteria) 歩 Ayumi (Walk, deeper meaning: walk your own way.)
Or
浜野 Hamano (seaside field) 三千代 Michiyo (three thousand generations)
Don't worry about me, I'm doing well overall. Just a little busy and stressed with so many things to do and take care of. It makes me wish I was still in high school or something. -Sigh.- Anyways, til' then, Medi-chan. Keep in touch. ^^
--
"A piece of a broken dream, will suddenly cause people pain.. We were both cowards, who closed our eyes and left.. Those hurtful words you said to me, I still keep in my pocket.. When I touch it with my fingertips.. I feel this pain I miss.."
Forget about you? Such thing is not possible in my mind. I would never forget my best friend. Never, ever, ever. ^^ I'm glad to know that you're alright. That really leaves me reassured. I was really worried. *Sigh* I wish I had internet at my home. Like that I could be up all night to wait for you to get on. T_T
I'll be sure to keep in touch by sending you messages when you reply. Please don't forget: You're always in my mind. There isn't a day I don't think about you, Burusu, so, please don't think I've forgotten about you. ^^
I'll be around if you need me. Take care. I miss you. I hope we'll be able to talk soon. ^^
--
My Japanese name is - 遠藤 Endoh (Distant wisteria) 歩 Ayumi (Walk, deeper meaning: walk your own way.)
Or
浜野 Hamano (seaside field) 三千代 Michiyo (three thousand generations)
--
"A piece of a broken dream, will suddenly cause people pain.. We were both cowards, who closed our eyes and left.. Those hurtful words you said to me, I still keep in my pocket.. When I touch it with my fingertips.. I feel this pain I miss.."
--
My Japanese name is - 遠藤 Endoh (Distant wisteria) 歩 Ayumi (Walk, deeper meaning: walk your own way.)
Or
浜野 Hamano (seaside field) 三千代 Michiyo (three thousand generations)
--
My Japanese name is - 遠藤 Endoh (Distant wisteria) 歩 Ayumi (Walk, deeper meaning: walk your own way.)
Or
浜野 Hamano (seaside field) 三千代 Michiyo (three thousand generations)
--
>______________________________ ___________,<
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